


Kara's Decision

by AliceClone13



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Anger, Angst, F/F, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Maybe a happy ending, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-16
Updated: 2018-05-16
Packaged: 2019-05-07 23:36:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14681838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliceClone13/pseuds/AliceClone13
Summary: Kara made a huge mistake. She needs to fix it. Onesided love. Or is it pre relationship? Minor mentions of Lena/James.





	Kara's Decision

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all!  
> This is my first fanfic, so I would appreciate feedback :)  
> For now it will be onesided love but I may change that in the future if inspiration hits. Minor mentions of Lena/James. Apologies if you don't like the pairing, but I was trying to stick as close to canon as possible.

“… I can never trust her again.”

  
In that moment, Kara felt her heart crumble. She barely heard what Lena said next, throwing out a generic reply in the hope that her sudden turmoil went unnoticed.

  
_How could I have screwed everything up so badly? I was so focused on my own anger I failed to see hers._ Kara knew she had to fix this, certain she would not survive losing the friendship of the woman in front of her. _How can I tell her how I truly feel now. Lillian was right, if I tell her the truth now I’ll lose her but if I don’t and she finds out later..._  Kara was torn. She knew if she didn't reveal her identity soon, she would force the rift between them to grow beyond repair.

  
“Lena.....” She had spoken without thought, unsure how long she had been thinking, or if Lena was even close enough to hear her name whispered in obvious anguish. Unfortunately for the blond hero, she had, and was now staring at her in confusion.

  
“Kara! What's wrong? You look like you’re going to cry?!” Lena had returned to her side, her natural accent slipping through, betraying her distress at seeing her friend so upset.

  
Kara realised her mistake, _Oh no, she heard me. What do I do? I have no choice, I can't lose her. She means so much to me._ “Lena... tonight, after we check on Ruby.... we need to talk. In private.”

  
“Kara?”

  
“It's ok Lena, I'd just rather not have this conversation around Alex.” _Oh Rao, if Alex found out what I plan to tell Lena she'd have kittens!.... now I wanna go visit some kittens.... No! Focus Kara!_

  
Lena didn't look convinced, but since she could see no reason to doubt her best friend's sincerity, she accepted Kara's need for privacy, whatever her reasons may be.

  
“Ok, we can talk later. Come on, the ice-cream is melting.”

~~~~~

  
Alex knew something was up the moment her sister and Lena walked through the door. Despite Kara's beliefs otherwise, Alex knew her sister had deep feeling for the brunette in front of her, and it was only a matter of time before Kara told the truth. She knew it was inevitable, and had moved past her own anger for her sisters sake. However the look on Kara's face now told her something had gone wrong.

  
“Kara, Lena, come in! Wow that's a lot of ice-cream, anyone else coming I should know about?” _Kara looks like someone kicked a puppy.... and a kitten..... and possibly a baby. I need to speak to her, find out what's going on._

  
Lena chuckled, “No, just us, I wasn't sure what to get but I knew Kara would probably finish the extra. Though I don't know where she keeps it!” Kara let out something akin to a laugh, though it came out a strangled mess to Alex's ears.

  
“Ok, well why don't you go put it in the freezer for now. Kara, can I speak with you for a second?”

Lena nodded to her suggestion, but shot them a confused look as she headed for the kitchen.

  
“Don't worry Lena. Just need to have a sisterly chat,” Alex had a sly look on her face when she stage whispered, “someone cleaned out my fridge without asking.” Lena laughed and continued into the kitchen.

“We'll just be outside, call if you or Ruby need anything, ok?”

  
Lena just nodded and made shooing movements towards them, “We'll be fine, go have your chat!”

  
Alex pulled Kara back out and down the hall slightly so they wouldn't be overheard, “Ok Kara, spill, what's wrong?”

  
“Wrong? Why would anything be wrong? Yep, totally fine here!” Kara tried to plaster an innocent look on her face but Alex was having none of it.

  
“Really Kara? You know its pointless lying to me, besides, that crinkle looks a mile long right now.”

  
A sudden look of annoyance flashed over Kara's face before her kicked puppy look returned, “stupid crinkle.”

  
“See? I know you Kara. Now tell me what’s wrong so I can help.”

  
“That's just it Alex. You can't help. This one’s all on me.”

  
“What do you mean?” Alex was confused now, and also a little scared of what exactly her sister had done for it to hurt her so badly.

  
“I've lost her Alex. I was so angry and determined to make her earn my trust, I never gave her a reason to trust me. She hates me Alex.” Kara now had tears running down her face.

  
“Who hates you Kara? I don't understand.”

  
“Lena.”

  
Alex could have smacked herself, _Well I should have seen that one coming, they've been getting into it pretty bad these last few weeks._

“Kara, sweetheart, why would you say that? Lena loves you.”

  
“I told you, Alex, she doesn't trust me anymore, she said so in the elevator coming up here.” Kara's dejected look intensified, “She said what I did was no better than her mother.”

  
At this Alex realised something, “You mean she hates Supergirl.”

  
“What's the difference Alex, as much as I try to keep Supergirl separate from my friendship with Lena, it's still me. But I'm going to fix it.”

  
Realisation dawned, “You're going to tell her.”

  
“What! Err.... no? Alex why would you say something so silly –”

  
“It's ok Kara.” _Really, how did she think I would react?_

  
“I mean..... wait what?”

  
“ I said it's ok. If you think telling her the truth is the right thing then I wont stop you. Did you really think I didn’t know Kara? You would do just about anything for that woman.”

  
“I... but... James! I would never do anything to –”

  
“I know Kara, but we’re not talking about James, or their relationship right now. We are talking about you not losing your best friend.”

  
Kara sighed, “I was going to tell her tonight. After we checked on Ruby.”

  
“It’ll be ok Kara. She may not forgive you for a while, but that woman loves you. She’ll forgive you eventually, and if she doesn't... well... I’ll be there to kick her ass for you.”

  
At this Kara let out a small laugh, but her expression quickly turned sad again, “No you wont Alex. She has every right to be mad at me. If her happiness no longer includes me, then I'll accept that.”

Kara started to wipe her face, “We should go back in, before she starts thinking we've killed each other over the contents of your fridge.”

  
“Ah... yes, well you do still owe me for that. You ate a weeks worth of food, do you have any idea how much it will cost to replace that?”

  
Kara cringed, “I was hungry?” Alex glared. “Ok, ok! I’ll replace it! Now, how do I look?”

  
Alex sighed, “Like someone kicked a puppy, but it'll have to do.”

  
They made their way back inside, where Lena had prepared everyone a bowl of ice-cream, or in Kara's case, a spoon in a tub. “I hope you weren't too hard on her Alex, “ Lena noted the look on Kara's face, “Aww, did you get yelled at? Here, I made your favourite!”

  
Lena held the container and spoon out for Kara, who smiled for the first time since exiting the elevator, “You know me so well!”

  
“Ok,” said Alex, “Lets get this ladies night underway! Ruby, you get to choose the movie!”

~~~~~

  
Several hours, a movie, and many tubs of ice-cream (for the Kryptonian) later the trio had finally managed to calm Ruby down enough to get some sleep. Lena was glad that Ruby seemed to have accepted their promise to bring Sam back, however she had found it difficult to focus most of the night. Her mind kept replaying the events from earlier. _Those two really were acting quite strangely. Though its not difficult to figure out what Kara was so upset about. Honestly, anyone who had half a brain and spent more than a passing moment with Kara would know. But why is she still clinging so hard to her secrets? Truth and justice my ass._ Lena sighed as she watched Kara clean up their mess while Alex showed Ruby where she could sleep.

  
As mad as she was, Lena knew she could never hate Kara. That, however, did not mean she would allow her to just continue treating Lena as she had been. Kara had made seriously questionable decisions of late, and Lena was sick of being lied to.

  
With that thought in mind, Lena approached Kara, who at this point had finished cleaning and was staring into space.

  
“Kara? Did you want to have that talk now?”

  
Kara adopted a rather amusing dear in the headlights expression, but nodded all the same.

  
“Lets say our goodbyes, then we can talk.”

  
Lena nodded, she had a feeling Kara wanted them somewhere they could both make a quick exit, should their talk become heated. And that place was most definitely as far from Ruby as possible. _I would rather not risk Alex shooting me should I lose my temper at Kara. And poor Ruby has had enough to deal with today._

  
“That's probably for the best.”

  
Lena turned towards Alex, who had just entered the kitchen, “How is Ruby doing?”

  
“As well as can be expected, though she is definitely calmer. She decided to try sleeping, but I will probably stay up a bit longer, in case she starts having nightmares. I know I would have if it were me.”

  
“Well, let us know if you need anything. Kara and I were thinking of heading home.”

  
Lena started making her way to the door, giving the sisters some privacy to say their goodbyes. She turned, once she reached the door, to see them hugging before Kara followed her. _If I'm not mistaken Alex clearly just wished her luck. I’m glad Kara is finally ready to talk, but her timing is terrible. Would she have chosen to tell me, had I not said anything?_ Lena tried to ignore that thought. She had already chosen to give Kara the time she needed to tell her the truth. If she dwelled on it for too long, she would likely become more angry, and more likely to say things she couldn't take back when all was said and done.

  
Kara opened the door for her, and led the way back into the elevator.

  
“So are you alone tonight, or do you and James have plans?”

  
Lena looked at Kara, noting her slight uneasiness.

  
“James messaged me earlier, apparently someone messed up the editorial for Thursday's edition so he has to stay at Catco until its fixed.”

  
“Oh? Did he say what the problem was? I used to help Cat with those so maybe –”

  
“Kara, it's fine. I'm sure James can handle it himself. Besides, wasn't the plan for us to talk?”

  
“Right, sorry. Force of habit.”

  
“It's alright Kara, I know Catco means a lot to you. But I believe you were suggesting we take this conversation to my penthouse?”

  
“Yes, yes I was. Though seriously Lena, its been two years, isn't it about time you found somewhere a little more permanent? I mean the Baldwin is nice and all, but renting a penthouse must be expensive.”

  
“I can afford it easily. But you do have a point. Shall we take my car?”

  
“Well I caught a bus here so.....”

  
Lena nearly gave herself away when she almost failed to contain her giggle. _Honestly, I should have figured it out sooner than I did. ‘Flew here on a bus’. I'm going to have such fun teasing her with that one._

  
Lena smiled, “My car it is.”

~~~~~

  
Kara twitched nervously as Lena let them into the penthouse, noting exactly where she could make a swift exit should one become necessary. Though one exit in particular no longer seemed an option. In hindsight she probably shouldn’t have expected it to still be one.

  
“They fixed the windows pretty quick.”

  
“Apparently they have construction and trades on standby as a rule now. You know, for Super related incidents.” Kara became more nervous when she noted the look of distaste that Lena now wore. “Though I suppose it's not entirely her fault.”

  
“Well there are a lot of ‘bad guys' popping up every week, I'm sure Supergirl doesn't mean to cause all that damage?” While she had meant that as a statement, even Kara could hear how it became a question, like she was looking for Lena's approval.

  
Lena smiled bitterly. “I'm sure there are many things Supergirl doesn't mean to cause, but that doesn't stop them from happening does it?” Lena was now looking pointedly at Kara, as if daring her to make another excuse for the Super she was so mad at.

  
Kara sighed. “You're right. Things happen that shouldn't and people make stupid mistakes. Blaming someone or something else isn't right.”

  
Lena looked mildly surprised that Kara was agreeing with her, but chose to remain silent. It was as if she knew Kara would continue on her own from this point, without further prompting.

  
_Rao, I really have screwed up big time. Well, I guess from this point I have nothing else to lose._

  
Kara took a long breath to steady herself. It didn't work. “Lena... there's something I’ve been meaning to tell you... I mean, I should have told you ages ago. But then the Daxamite invasion happened.... well before that really.... when Mon-el showed up I got distracted, but Lillian said.... no, that's not important.....”

  
Lena was becoming impatient, though she did catch her mothers name and filed it away to bring up later. Kara had started rambling and was clearly working herself further from revealing the truth. Lena took pity on her.

  
“Kara.”

  
“But when you think about it, some of that may not even have happened if –”

  
“ _Kara!_ ”

  
Kara froze. “Lena? Oh! I'm sorry I got off track!”

  
“Perhaps it would be easier if I helped you along then, yes? I know Kara.”

  
“Well of course you do, it was a pretty obvious tangent –”

  
“No Kara. I mean I _know_.”

  
_Wait, does she mean? Oh Rao....._

  
“Lena?”

  
“Well, I mean, it's fairly obvious. For one, you should really get different earrings, you have the same scar, and honestly Kara, _I flew here on a bus?_ ”

  
Kara blushed. “Admittedly not one of my best moments.”

  
“Though I do have to admit I only figured it out more recently than that. I started to suspect before the Daxamite invasion, but I’m a little disappointed in myself for not putting the puzzle together sooner. Glasses and a ponytail shouldn't be a legitimate disguise.”

  
“It's worked pretty well for me so far....”

  
“Has it though? How many people that you are close to have figured it out?”

  
“Um....”

  
“That's what I thought. But I believe you had something you wanted to talk about? Our conversation in the elevator perhaps?”

  
And there it was. The thing Kara dreaded. There was a high likelihood, at least in Kara's mind, that she was about to lose her best friend.

  
“I'm so sorry Lena. What I did... what I said to you... it was out of line. I know you were just trying to help. I have my reasons to hate Kryptonite but they are not an excuse for attacking you the way I did.”

  
“Good. At least you understand that. But an apology isn't enough this time Kara. You hurt me. You talk so much about truth and justice but how can I believe that, when you keep so many secrets. How can you lecture me on the importance of truth, then turn around and lie to my face. I am your friend Kara! At least I thought I was.”

  
“You are!” Kara cried, “You mean more to me than most of the people on this planet! I was trying to keep you safe!”

  
“How Kara? How is keeping me in the dark keeping me safe?”

  
Kara was silent for a moment. Then, “Everyone that I told got hurt. Not immediately, but they did. Did I ever tell you what happened with Myriad?”

  
Lena shook her head.

  
“Non found out who I cared about most. He used them to get to me. He made Winn and James jump from the top of Catco. He strapped Kryptonite to Alex, and brainwashed her to attack me.”

  
“That must have been terrifying.”

  
“It was, and it wasn't the only time people got hurt because of me. Before you came to National City... well, you heard about the time Supergirl went nuts? I was under the influence of failed synthetic kryptonite. Max Lord managed to create red kryptonite. I nearly killed Alex, Lena. The part of me that stuff brought forward, it knew she was the one person I loved above all others.”

  
Lena momentarily looked sympathetic, but her gaze hardened once again. “While I can understand that you would find that traumatic, I fail to see how that gave you the right to lie to and verbally abuse me.”

  
“It doesn't.”

  
“Then why tell me?”

  
“Because I need you to understand why I kept my identity from you for so long. I was trying to protect you... from me.”

  
“Well it's a little late for that now.”

  
Kara could see that Lena was beginning to lose her temper.

  
“I truly am sorry, Lena. I understand if you hate me. Lillian said you would. I should have listened.”

  
_I should have told her sooner. I could have avoided all of this. Maybe if I had.... no, Lena chose James. I can’t do this. To me or to Lena._ Though a rebellious part of her brain reminded her that Lena didn't actually know Kara was in love with her. _I only want her to be happy. If James makes her happy, well, he's certainly doing a better job than me right now._ Kara was in tears, sure Lena was about to make her leave.

  
“... Kara.... I don't hate you... I don't know if I can trust you right now, but I don't hate you. I can't. You're my best friend. That's why it hurt so much.”

  
“So...”

  
“I can't forgive you Kara, not yet. But maybe in time.... You have to promise never to treat me like that again.”

  
“I won't!”

  
“We'll see.”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it! Find me on tumblr at dndnoobhere.


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